Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Soulless, but not Heartless!

     By Alyssa Showalter
     The legend tells us, that all “Ginger” people have no soul, and will steal yours if you make eye contact with one long enough. Being a redhead myself, I would like to confirm this is true, and if you believe me, than you know that gullible is also in the dictionary. If you are redheaded, you know this isn’t true, and in fact, would like to deny that you have stolen anyone’s soul. Let us ask, when and where did this all start? Is it really possible to steal a soul? Sally sells souls on the seashore, because she known seashells are worthless. Diamonds might be forever, but souls have an expiration date of eternity.

     Personally, I have never found the “soulless” jokes to be funny. I don’t bring it up at parties with new people. I like to make the best impression possible. However, if someone does bring it up, I only laugh with them. All while I make eye contact with them, making them feel as uncomfortable as they have made me.

     It is not easy being redheaded. The very fact that we get sunburned in the shade should be a sign that we are not a very tough enemy. The people of Britain believe the South Park episode and fear of being bitten by one of us. Redheaded women get sexual harassed, and the men are treated with very little respect. People with Ginger-phobia, are not really worth dealing with. I mean, considering they most likely carry the MC1R gene and karma will deal with them.

     It was back during the Roman Empire that this prejudice against redheads came from. It was the men and women that reflected pale skin and flaming red hair, which is almost a similar description for “The Devil”. Later on, the rumor and idea that redheads sold their souls to the devil, so to serve him and spread sin. Yes, because the last sin I committed was with a jar of Nutella and Oreos.

Oh, no. They are catching onto the Devil’s plan, to spread diabetes to everyone on Earth. Whatever shall we do?

     The Greeks believed that we would turn into Vampires after we died. There is so much fail in that sentence that I cannot help but laugh. I do need to admit, we are much closer to the vampire race than Edward Cullen was. Not to mention, people are more scared of me than his glittery pasty ass. So, perhaps the Greeks did have a point.


     Do we have souls? That is up for a pointless debate that I will not take part in. What no one points out is that we have heart. Yes, we are fiery and passionate, all the better to fight for our loved ones with. We love with as much as the rest of the world, if not more. We know what it feels to be mistreated and discriminated against.

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