When I tell this to myself, I still cannot believe it.
It's like I'm dreaming, and everything I want is gifted to me with a red bow.
Well, minus the red bow, things did come. After a shitty 2 months, I have earned my one day.
I am moving into a nice apartment by myself, which is something I have been wanting for many years.
And, the Alice Nine signing event.
I will mostly focus on Nao, because he's my favourite member. I'm biased,... so sue me.
I met Hiroto, and I finally introduced myself and told him my name. I was on a role, until he started talking back. That's when things got interesting.
I told him that I enjoyed the Singapore live, and he was happy about that. Asking me if I was able to go. I said yes, and he told me the photo book has lots of memories from the tour. I smiled and had no idea what to say back. So, I just told him thank you very much.
Next was Nao. My heart was racing, and I was just wanting to get it over with, but allowed to say all that I wanted. I greeted him, and after saying hello, he said, "Nao desu!", as he does sometimes.
I was a little caught off guard, but just smiled and responded with, "Arisa desu!".
Which made him smile and happy. He said that my name was nice, and started signing my book.
I told him that I went to Singapore and enjoyed the live a lot. He was happy about that, and after that I forced myself to tell him I liked him. In Japanese too. I want him to know, that I am his fan. That I may talk to the other members, but I am loyal to him.
He looked up at me, as I was saying the words, and knew I had something to say. He and I did have moments of talking over each other, or talking at the same time. After I said that I like him, he was a little shocked and happy, and grabbed my hand to shake it. We looked into each other, and smiled. I was so happy, and just wanted to keep holding his hand forever.
He noticed I was wearing the Valentine day parka, and he was commenting on how it was warm, or something. I couldn't catch what he was saying. But, I was just so happy that he was shaking my hand and then touched my parka.
He then told me that he will wait for me at the FC live. Which makes me sad, because I don't have a ticket and I don't know if I can go.
He was the major highlight.
Fast forward to after my friend went through meeting the members.
She was just as pumped and excited as I was. Went spent a good amount of time to collect ourselves, and talk about what happened.
She told me what happened when she met Nao.
She told all the members that she couldn't go to the Singapore live, but would have loved to. When she was talking to Nao, she also added that her friend, me, was able to go.
Nao responded with, "Oh yeah, I remember she was just here. I was just talking to her. I like her, I think she's fun/interesting"(I don't know word for word)
My good friend has been telling Nao about me, "her friend" for over 2 years, and he has only been told about me, but never met me. This year was the first time I have finally met Nao.
Today was the third time(or 4th) time meeting him. And second time telling him that I like him.
So, he knows!
So, for him to tell my friend, "Oh yeah, she was just here. I like her."
I fell to the floor and just couldn't believe what had just happened. That she just told me that, and I pretty much have been freaking out all day.
And to be honest, I know that he likes me as a fan and person. Nothing romantic. ^_^ And that's all that matters anyway. That he knows I exist, and for him to like me back is a bonus. And I am at peace. I have made it pretty far.
But to hear that your favourite member likes you, and thinks your interesting is awesome. I love it.
I wasn't wearing anything special, and in fact I was pretty dirty. I looked like a bum, or I think I did.
But my point her being, I was finally myself. I wasn't putting on a mask, and mostly just saying what was true in my heart. I dressed like myself, and felt comfortable that way.
And that made the guys comfortable too. Nao was happy to know that a foreigner likes him, and Tora was laughing that I wanted to know more about his tattoos.
And I had a deep "thank you" session with Saga-sensei.
It was perfect.
I have been dealing with a depression, gained weight, and lost all sense of control over my life.
But things are slowly working out, and coming out okay.
If life is throwing lemons at you, it means to make lemonade and wait for the big good thing to come.
For me, it was to see the Alice boys again and to hear that Nao likes me too *^^*
-Nihongochick2
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